Italian towns, bail bondsmen, and Yashica cameras

There are days when riding becomes second nature. Your mind wants something and the motorbike just executes it. Instantly. Obediently. Intention flows directly through to execution and there isn't really a need for a body interface to compile the mind's plan into instructions for the machine below. Today was one of those days.

I had spent all morning reading about AI, trying to keep up with materials shared with me by smarter people working deep in this knowledge mine. So it's wonderful now to let the mind go blank and focus on nothing but the road ahead. The bike performs perfectly today, approaching every curve with the right line, dipping exactly at the proper instant and with just the right amount of lean, to arc—fast and smooth!—through the curve, before straightening up quickly, so it may peel away rapidly, leaving behind a wispy streak of rubber and a thunderous roar in its wake. A few slower cars—cagers, as bikers call them—occasionally get in the way to disrupt this weaving rhythm on two wheels.

I stop at the top of the mountain for a few minutes, walk around to stretch the legs, then get back on the bike to descend down to a cafe where a cappuccino and a newspaper would be my due reward for good and safe riding. It's a warm day and I peel off the riding gear with great relief. I would gladly ride in warm weather without any, but any biker with half a brain would blindly follow the ATGATT rule—all the gear all the time—so he wouldn't have to part with his precious cerebral fraction.

"Jonathan! One cappuccino!" goes the barista, for that's my self-chosen name today. In my younger days, I would pick names of Mughal emperors and watch curious heads turn when "Oh-ranga-zeb" rang out, but I may have since matured. 

A couple of older guys in bicycling gear come over and sit down on the table next to me. One of them wears a blue and yellow cycling jersey that reads something like Italy Road Tour. 

"Da dove sei?" I venture, taking a chance. 

Turns out he's Americano and non parla italiano, but my overture does manage to extract a smile. 

The duo had cycled in southern Italy last year, down the southern province of Puglia, the heel of the historic boot and an area I'm quite familiar with. They had started from Bari on the Adriatic coast and headed west to Matera, a small town with homes cut deep into cliff rocks that spectacularly reflect the sun, especially at sunset. Continuously occupied since the eighth millennium BC, Matera is one of the oldest cities in Europe but is better recognized for hosting the frenetic opening sequence of the Bond flick, No Time to Die, where Triumph Scrambler motorbikes, ridden by hordes of bad guys, furiously tear down precarious ancient cobblestone streets, chasing after brawny brash Daniel Craig's sinewy silvery Aston Martin DB5 on steroids. 

My new friends describe the other towns they passed through, finishing up in the elaborate Baroque city of Lecce, better known as the Florence of the South. Our conversation is animated and I can actually fill in some of the town names they have forgotten.

Our shared experiences promote even more chatter. Mark and Don are retired and bicycle together multiple times a week. They've come up from Los Gatos this morning and this is their mid-ride break. I ask them if they came up Route 9.

"Nah!" says Don. "Too much traffic. We take the back roads, so we may leer at the ten million dollar homes that we cannot buy."

"But you do look like a million bucks...," I add, with a laugh.

"...which is still nine short," he adds spontaneously and all three of us laugh together. I know I'm in fun company. 

Somehow the topic meanders into culture, wealth, ostentation and how Silicon Valley, that started with simple and humble midwestern values where heart—rather than wealth—was worn on sleeves, has since lost that plot. 

Mark comes from a family that ran a flooring business he inherited. He explains how his business couldn't dream of having happy hour Fridays... "like you tech guys used to!"... trusting employees to keep up decorum in the fog of brew. 

"My dad would drink and drive on Fridays and was even arrested a few times. The only reason my mother never knew about this was because he had two bail bondsmen as friends who would put up the money to get him out, so he would be back home, rather than sobering up in the cooler." 

We all laugh. That was a different age and time.

Dan is a retired teacher of AP (Advanced Placement) Literature at a high school. Mark calls out the number of times he has seen students come up and thank Dan for having made a difference in their lives. Dan smiles wanly in modesty. Their mutual respect and admiration wins me. 

Upon learning that I'm from India, Dan discloses that his daughter has a Harvard PhD in South Asian Studies, has traveled all over India, and is fluent in Hindi. He tries to name places but the only one that comes to his mind is Lucknow, which might reflect the way a speaker of English recalls Indian city names. Thiruvananthapuram barely gives itself a chance. I let him know that I would be hard pressed to have a conversation with her, given my southerly disposition.

We've been talking for a while and they suddenly realize that I've kept them away from the rest of their ride. They clamber up, put on their gloves, check their shoes, and get ready to leave. We exchange numbers and I promise to accompany them on a bicycle ride soon. 

"Maybe one day, we can even do Italy again!" I add, as they head out. 

"What the heck was that about?" I ask myself as a I settle down and read for a bit. Half hour later, just as I'm about to leave, I spot an unusually large camera resting on the table behind me. I walk over to ask about it. The owner is a young and friendly fellow and the beast is a black cuboid Yashica TLR (twin lens reflex) from the 1960s. He allows me to take a look. I pick it up and look vertically down into a viewer that projects the image seen by the one of the big bad viewing lenses out front, but far less lit than the digital images we are used to seeing. The guy's a camera buff and collector and has quite a number of classics in his collection. He reels off brands and names that don't register with me and tells me that he develops his own prints. 

"Old manual cameras are back in fashion," he says. "But it's an expensive hobby."

He shows me several prints in black and white. Some are candid shots of muscular sports cars squinting at the camera, so I'm guessing this isn't his only expensive hobby. I didn't spot an Aston Martin DB5, though.

I take leave, start up the Triumph which shares the same 1200 parallel twin motor with the ones that brazenly tore down Matera in hot pursuit of double-o-seven, and sedately head back home for lunch.

Buddhism Amidst Redwoods

The Saratoga Gap is a mountain pass that has been used since the late 19th century to cross over the Santa Cruz mountains. The logging trail that descended from the crest of the mountains down to the towns of Saratoga and San Jose bearing redwood-laden wagons, is now a winding tar ribbon with aggressively banked curves, separated by short straights, that could put up g-forces normally found only on the racetrack. No surprise that on weekends, the mountains reverberate with the throaty roars of exotic sports cars and the banshee screams of barely street-legal motorcycles, as they pass brave bicyclists riding punishingly uphill for miles.

On an early Saturday morning, I reach the rim of the gap and ride on ahead onto Big Basin Way. Many miles later, I approach the junction where the road ahead had been closed for over two years to repair the devastation wreaked by the fire of 2020 upon the towering redwoods of the Big Basin State Park. That road-closed sign is gone today, so I continue straight ahead to visit the park through miles of tight curves—or twisties, as bikers like to call them.

Cars endure curves. Motorcycles crave them.

There’s damage everywhere—charred, browned, and stunted trees, amongst green ones—creating arid brown vistas in large sections that were verdant green. Some of these giants had lasted a thousand or more years of drought and fire, only to succumb to this one. I reach the state park without passing a single other vehicle and roll into the parking lot. A ranger sits disinterestedly in his cabin and I park the bike to take a stroll.

Walking around in protective motorcycle gear with a backpack and a helmet must be the closest modern approximation to a medieval knight in chainmail armor. Nothing is ever comfortable. Things conspire to poke you in unexpected places. You’re never sure if you’ll be around long enough, off the bike, to make it worth your while to pop off your lid.

If you do take off your helmet, you must cart it around until you can put it back on. If you leave it on, you feel about as out of place as a scuba diver at a nudist convention. Even if you attract any conversation, your ear-plugs will dutifully muffle it. You get unknowingly hotter, like that frog in the boiling water experiment. You want to scratch yourself in exactly the places where you cannot. To pee is no longer an urge, but a calculated deliberation. I do sometimes wonder if the ride is worth all this punishment.

But all this has given me new admiration for the knight in his pointy gear—the lance, the sword, the visor… the boot tips. How ever did he stumble through life without harrowingly poking his wretched groin?

But at least a knight had a squire. I don’t. I would have commissioned mine to help me off the bike, hold my helmet, and wheel the heavy bike into and out of parking spots. Perhaps he could even have cleaned and greased the drive chain, given his way with the metal stuff. Or brought me a hot masala chai and two pointy samosas.

I get back on the bike and ride past the park. Dangling limbs of dead trees gesticulate awkwardly in the sun. I ride for about half an hour until an intriguing roadway sign forces a stop. I park and see a hand-painted sign pointing to Pagoda and another to Monastery. 

I’m at a monastery that was started by Taungpulu Sayadaw, a renowned Burmese forest monk of the most ancient Theravada tradition of Buddhism. There isn’t a soul anywhere. Perhaps they’ve been given up to Zoom. I leave the bike below and trudge up to the golden pagoda that looks lonely amidst the redwoods towering around it. Across the way, I see the monastery that’s supposed to hold a body relic of the venerable monk.

The road ends at Boulder Creek and I stop at the Tree House Cafe and put in for a coffee and a vege-burrito. The cafe is quirky and family-run and I notice how a massive redwood tree growing right through the roof has given the place its name. A pleasant girl at the counter takes my order, pronouncing my name perfectly. Turns out she has a friend with the same name.

I pick up the coffee and see an older woman sitting alone at a window table, lit brightly by the slanting rays of the morning sun. I ask to join her and she happily waves me in. We start up a conversation that would take up the next ninety minutes and last multiple rounds of coffee, meandering through children, grandchildren, mental health, spousal relationships, Mexico, Spain (she had a parent from each country), and the slumping real estate market. It’s amazing how strangers will divulge their personal stories and this always restores in me a fundamental faith in mankind.

Donning my gear again, I ride along Bear Creek Road and stop at a few interesting places where the sun trickles past the canopy to light up the forest floor in bright patches. I stop at the Bear Creek Nature Preserve about a dozen miles away that opened to the public a mere three years ago.

Across from the parking lot are the ruins of Alma College—one of only two Jesuit seminaries in the country—that was shut down in the late 1960s after decades of operation. I walk over to take a look at the buildings of the same theological order that founded my own high school in the mid 19th century, more than 10,000 miles away in Bangalore. I owe much of my foundational education to the tireless Jesuit fathers whose pedagogical methods included writing, memorization, and generous use of the wooden cane.

I wonder how my kids today would accept the profound explanation we were offered: Spare the rod and spoil the child.

I join Highway 17 and head towards Los Gatos. Unlike most exit ramps, the one for downtown Las Gatos is a straight one that comes up abruptly on the left. A motorist must exit here at high speed, yet slow down rapidly and sufficiently before they hit the first light at the heart of downtown to stop inches away from the unwary mom languidly pushing her stroller across the crosswalk. I downshift rapidly and perhaps too aggressively, for the bike shudders a bit but stays on course. For this dose of stability, I owe thanks to the slipper clutch.

A motorcycle clutch is a mechanical device that allows a running engine to be decoupled from the drive wheel—the rear one. You need this for a number of reasons, not the least of which is to be able to stop at a light, and if you were Peter Fonda, coolly smoke a cigarette while you waited. The clutch connects the engine, the drivetrain, and the rear wheel in a tight linkage that must be broken from time to time to get things done. An engaged clutch will disengage the engine, allowing it to spin freely and independently from the rear wheel, as during a gear change or at a light.

When a motorcycle is downshifted, the inertia of the rear wheel turns it faster than the engine, which is braking rapidly. By letting the clutch out slowly, the rider allows the clutch plates to slip against one another, so the extra momentum of the rear wheel is dissipated as friction at the clutch.

When a motorcycle is rapidly downshifted through multiple gears, the momentum of the rear wheel cannot find sufficient opposition from the clutch. Yet it must obey Sir Isaac Newton and find a way to dissipate that extra momentum. The easiest way out is for the wheel to lock up and slide out, causing what bikers call a lowside crash. A slipper clutch detects this back momentum and allows the clutch to automatically slip, without rider intervention, so the slack is taken up at the clutch rather than being forced at the wheel.

Technology wins and keeps the imprudent rider from parting with the bike.

As I head home, I see an older gentleman walking along with a grocery bag under each arm. I recognize him as my neighbor, but I can’t really stop the motorcycle and offer to pick him up, or his bags. I notice his car on the street when I get back and it hits me right then that Orthodox Jewish families don’t drive cars on Saturday, the Shabbat. I’ve lived across them for years and I can’t believe that I’ve never observed this until now.

So a bit of Buddhism, Catholicism, and Judaism conspired together to make my morning lovely. I feel privileged to live in a country where each can boldly thrive, but more importantly, motorcycles can roam free.

Hmmm! I'm at Umunhum

If you saw a windowless concrete eight-story cuboid building perched improbably atop a 3,500-foot mountain, like a sentinel against the clear blue sky, you must be looking at Mt Umunhum in the Santa Cruz mountains. The Cube is visible from miles away and this mountain was opened up to the public only in 2017, almost four decades after being decommissioned as part of a US Air Force station that housed about 125 airmen and their families in its heyday.

After riding east on Hicks Road from the town of Los Gatos into the Sierra Azul Open Space Preserve, I turn right and pick up Mt Umunhum Road to begin my ascent of the eponymous mountain. It’s early morning and I have the mountain almost to myself. The motorcycle leans eagerly around the curves, appearing to enjoy the cold mountain air and the light fog almost as much as its rider.

I stop at the Bald Mountain parking area to enjoy the views of the valley and the Almaden reservoir far below. As it swirls around the mountain, the road finds the gaps between trees to reveal occasional views of the bizarre mountaintop with its anomalous cube.

The cube was part of an early warning system set up in 1957, eight years after the Soviets had detonated their first atomic bomb and on the same year they would usher in the Cold War by putting an unremarkable two-foot metallic orb called Sputnik into low Earth orbit, and a mere three years before they would detonate the world’s most powerful thermonuclear device over Novaya Zemlya—deep within the Arctic Circle—that could have inflicted third-degree burns upon a hapless herder more than a hundred miles away, had he picked just that moment to step outside to milk his fondest reindeer for his morning coffee.

This unlikely mountain was called upon to do duty for our national defense, against unrelenting Soviet progress and military prowess. An 85-foot tall and 60-foot wide concrete fortress was erected and a massive red-and-white 150-foot sweeping radar hoisted above to scan the foreboding western skies—five times a minute—anxiously looking for the first signs of the cataclysmic Red menace.

Meanwhile, the folks in the towns of Los Gatos and San Jose lived through the hedonistic Sixties reassured that their skies above were keenly watched while they partied below, even as their radios would bleep five times a minute and put a lousy dent on their Jimi Hendrix Experience!

There’s something surprisingly asymmetrical when riding a motorcycle: cornering. Taking a right corner is always much harder than taking a left one. When you ride on the right side of the road and prepare to take a left turn, your eyes can see further, and through the turn, because of the space afforded by the oncoming lane on your left. By picking the line early and making use of the full width of the road, a rider can execute left turns precisely, even if the corner tightens up faster than expected.

Right turns can be blind, since you cannot easily see through the corner while riding on the right side of the road, especially when a mountain side looms to your right. A mistake in judging a right turn can run the motorcycle wide enough to drift across the centerline and put it directly onto the path of oncoming vehicles. Right-handed riders might also be more inclined to rely on their right eye, which has a natural advantage on left turns but is almost useless on the right. Many motorcycle accidents happen on poorly-judged right turns.

Training your vision is essential to safe riding. You constantly watch the road surface for surprises conniving to unseat you. You must consciously look where you want to go and this can be quite disconcerting when cornering, for you must turn your head and almost look over your shoulder and through the corner to the far end of the curve, trusting your peripheral vision to watch the road immediately ahead.

I park the bike at the top and walk up to the unsightly cube that hides a dazzling—almost 360 degree—view of Silicon Valley, the mountains across the bay, and the dark ocean to the west.

As I walk around, I imagine a young bored Cold War airman in brown camouflages sitting inside that concrete cage in front of a deeply recessed green terminal with a fat click-etty keyboard, a smoldering filterless Camel with an inch-long-ash-tip dangling precipitously from the corner of his mouth. A half-eaten ham sandwich sits on a well-thumbed issue of Playboy on his desk as he languidly watches for that one sinister ping that would metamorphose into a squadron of long range Tu-95 Soviet bombers (NATO codename, “Bear”) carrying atomic bombs that would ruthlessly take out San Francisco, LA, Seattle, and Chicago in one single scorching orchestrated first-mover attack, sending half the continent instantly up to Jesus and making Communism the religion for the world… once all the dust had settled and St Peter’s Gate had fallen off its tired hinges.

Our twenty-something airman’s only job was to stop all this before it actually happened. Since that terminal radar blip never came, he probably kept smoking them Camels and putting away ham sandwiches until one day the bosses put him out to pasture down the mountain, so they might bring up a fresh set of keen eyes that would lock on to that unremitting green radar screen inside the blue darkness of the whopping concrete bunker… and take possession of the raggedy Playboy.

I ride back, mindful to avoid using the rear brakes going downhill, given the lighter load that drops the traction of the rear tire. I get back onto Hicks Road and continue to the town of Old Almaden.

Old Almaden was a mercury mine, the first of any kind in California, that had started operating even before the Gold Rush. It was named after Almaden in Spain, the world’s largest and most productive quicksilver mine and lived up to its christening by becoming the world’s second largest, producing over 70 million dollars of quicksilver over its lifetime—a fortune unmatched even by any gold mine in the state.

The earliest miners from Mexico and Spain were followed by English miners from Cornwall, with a history of mining going back to the Bronze Age. Later, Chinese immigrants worked the mines, the kitchen, and the laundry. New Almaden developed a Spanishtown and an Englishtown, but curiously no Chinatown. That San Jose had five, may have had something to do with it.

I pull into the grounds of the stately Casa Grande, a three-story brick, adobe, and wood structure, that was the palatial residence of the mine’s manager and is now a mining museum. It is closed, so I walk through a small gazebo by the side of the building to gaze at the landscaped gardens behind.

On my ride back, I stop for breakfast at the Blvd Cafe in San Jose. Working on a bagel with cream cheese and avocado, a laminated faded grade school report embossed on my tabletop catches my eye. It’s for Joe Hutchinson from Chandler Junior High—one of just eight students to secure a B in History in his eight grade class of thirty seven students.

The year?—1930! I wonder what ever happened to that studious Depression-era kid.

Coffee and Surf

When the menu flaunts four types of avocado toasts including one that combines pickled red onions with creamy almond butter that you can wash down with lavender or honey bee latte, you’re probably in a California cafe. Should faces with beards and nose rings outnumber wrists with Apple watches, you’re not in Silicon Valley. If the dude behind you in the line is nestling an eight or nine-foot surfboard in bronzed arms emblazoned with a deep blue tattoo that continues under his hooded shirt before emerging on the other side to complete the picture, you’re in Santa Cruz, baby!

It’s eight in the morning at the 11th Hour Cafe in downtown Santa Cruz and yes!… I order an avocado toast along with a merely plain coffee and set up by the entrance on a bar stool against a polished pine-slab tabletop—just where I can see the patrons as they wander in and order at the all-girls counter, before getting situated. Which they can with plenty of options, for this cafe has seating everywhere: outdoors at the front, where a woman in a green shawl and absurdly tall platform slippers sips her coffee above a golden retriever that waits calmly at her feet, a massive snout resting on broad paws; a large room out back with wooden tables and chairs and a few sofas; and even an outside patio. But we aren’t done.

There’s a coffee roastery at the back, a dimly-lit full bar with high-gloss dark wood veneer that looks primped for an evening act, and store merchandise all over that includes t-shirts, hoodies, ceramic mugs, and assorted coffee gear. Potted green cacti and ferns sprout randomly, like mold on a bread slice. An ancient wooden upright piano broods in a dark corner.

Early that Sunday morning, I had ridden down to the town of Los Gatos to take California Route 17 connecting San Jose with Santa Cruz, across the mountains. The road has few cars out this early but will be jam-packed by noon with families driving down to the beaches and further beyond into the towns around Monterey Bay, eager to be shocked out of their Covid stupors by the cool April mountain wind and the frigid Pacific water.

The highway weaves left and right, with sharp turns and teasing curves as it finds the easiest path through the mountains, like a river yearning for the ocean. Route 17 was built in the early part of the 20th century and was relaid after 1950 when the Lexington Reservoir was created, inundating the towns of Lexington and Alma through which the highway passed.

You notice things on a motorcycle that you never do when you have a roof over your head or pillars bisecting your eyes. The asphalt hurtles faster towards you, the trees loom higher even as the sun plays hide-and-seek behind them, and the wind buffets your head in an unabating reminder of true speed.

Yet you see more and everything looks a bit bigger when there’s no frame around it: hills, ravines, streams, cattle, and the smudged faces of little kids flattened up against car windows as you roar by and offer a friendly thumbs-up (with your left hand please, or you will kill the throttle!)

A motorcycle has multiple controls—a clutch, a hand brake, a foot brake, and gears—creating enough work for every limb to stay busy while coordinating closely, but no control is more important or underrated than the one under your right wrist—the throttle.

A smooth ride has everything to do with a smooth throttle. Rolling off the throttle closes the throttle control value that regulates the amount of air that gets into the engine. As the valve closes it creates a low pressure at the intake of the engine, making the cylinders have to work much harder to compress against a partial vacuum. This saps their energy, drops their power, and rapidly slows down the bike through engine braking. Meanwhile, the engine control unit (or ECU) that constantly monitors the throttle position sensor and a host of other sensors, has already instructed the fuel injectors to starve the cylinders by cutting off their fuel.

Dropping a gear, further amplifies the braking by increasing the engine speed (rpm) even as fuel remains shut off. This creates even more resistance against the pumping action of the pistons which causes the bike to slow down yet further. Modern motorcycles have powerful high-compression engines that react rapidly to very small changes in the throttle.

The opposite happens when that right hand opens the throttle: the bike surges ahead, eager to pass everything. A throttle opened up at low speed with the clutch pulled in and suddenly let out, can deliver power so instantaneous that the forces can swing a bike around its center of gravity before the tires can bite into the ground, causing a wheelie where the front wheel lifts clear off the ground, like a bucking steer trying to lose its rider. A good rider can cross mountains by just controlling the throttle and without ever touching the brakes, if only he could check the juvenile enthusiasm of his fidgety right hand.

I’m betting that Hollywood tough guy, Will Smith—he with that twitchy right arm—wouldn’t be the one to do it.

I leave the cafe late morning and ride down towards the ocean looking for Beach Street, where I turn and climb up onto W Cliff Drive that ascends along the edge of a cliff, away from Cowell Beach below me.

To my left, the Santa Cruz wharf runs over eight hundred meters out into the open ocean, as the longest pier on the west coast. It hosts restaurants, gift shops, and wine-tasting salons above, and sea lions below, that rest in the wooden rafters and let everyone know. I pull up at the Lighthouse Field State Beach, at the tip of a broad promontory where the road starts to turn inwards again, park the bike, and walk over to the edge of the cliff above the water.

Below me, for hundreds of meters on either side are surfers—riding waves, paddling back to catch the next one, or simply resting atop the surging water to recover from their exertions. This is Steamer Lane, among the most famous surfing locations on the west coast and one of the best places to ride the quintessential North California wave. It has four zones running left to right that generate different waves and surfing experiences.

The wetsuit was invented here in the early 1950s and is often credited to Jack O’Neill—a body surfer and World War II navy pilot—although the inventor was more likely Hugh Bradner, a physicist from the University of California at Berkeley who arrived at this neoprene invention when he studied the problems encountered by frogmen in frigid waters.

I’m guessing male shrinkage wasn’t one of them.

Surfing was brought to California in 1885 by three Hawaiian princes who rode the Santa Cruz waves on surfboards crafted with Santa Cruz redwood. Surfing likely originated in the south Polynesian islands before it made its way to Hawaii and consumed its idle and bucolic royalty. I walk by the Surfing Museum where a plaque illustrates the story. The brothers took their original surfboards back to Hawaii. More than a hundred years later, in 2015, the boards were brought back to Santa Cruz for a historic visit.

I start up the Triumph and ride across town—past gas stations, Mexican restaurants, Chinese takeouts, closed real estate offices and art studios, to get back onto highway 17.

Miles later a white Ferrari screams past, doing at least thirty miles over the speed limit as it swings around in a wide curve. I can proudly tell you that my right arm didn’t even twitch.

Indian Street Food and Harley Sound

Sometimes you need a good reason to throw a leg over a motorcycle and plot a course. A jaunt to a food truck is one such reason. So on a cold evening, I set out on a ride to find a food truck that would serve up chaat. My Apple map shows at least four, so I pick one and ride several miles on the Lawrence Expressway that runs for a couple of miles at a time, between each set of lights—just perfect for cafe racers. 

Cafe racing was a motorcycle subculture that evolved in the early sixties in Britain where rebellious rockabillies raced custom bikes—lightened up with chopped-off fenders and fitted with swept-back pipes and conical megaphone mufflers—between the droopy traffic lights of London. And yes, Triumph motorcycles were at the thick of it.

I turn into Homestead Road and pull up just under a mile from the one-mile circular spaceship headquarters of the most valuable company in the world and about two miles from Homestead High that graduated its iconic founder and most famous student, Steve Jobs. 

At the corner of a convenience store lot, a food truck bears stripes that proudly make up the colors of the Indian flag and stands in the shady swath of a sleepy willow. New Delhi Chaat is its promise and I stop at the counter to check things out. 

A helpful young lady listens patiently as I succumb to the lure of the menu and change my mind several times, even as I remind myself that chaat always renders my eyes bigger than my belly. Payment must be made inside the store, so I step in to hand my card over to the cashier.

We start talking and I find out that he's a Pashtun from the northwestern Pakistani city of Peshawar—due east of the Khyber Pass on the ancient Silk Road connecting East and West and the conduit for over two millennia of invasions into the Indian subcontinent—from Greeks, Persians, and Turkic-Mongols. Britannia, of course, ruled the waves and took the sea route!

The cashier spoke Pashto and Urdu, unlike his Afghani blood-brothers across the border who speak Pashto and Dari. We talk cricket and that invariably leads to World Cup winning cricket captain and current Prime Minister of Pakistan, Imran Khan, also a Pashtun.

I walk back out and the girl offers me a hot masala chai—on the house. I clutch it for warmth and watch a Hindi movie playing on a TV screen mounted at the side of the food truck that aims to keep a customer's eyes as busy as their jaws.

I look at the menu again as I wait for my takeout and the dahi batata puri catches my attention. A gear clicks in my brain as I realize I have the perfect way to explain the distinctive sound of a Harley Davidson motor. Here's how it goes.

b-a-T-a-T-a! 

Say that aloud. Go loud on the Ts and stay soft on the As and the B. Try it again and listen to yourself as you speed it up. 

Congratulations! You are now mimicking a four-stroke Harley V-twin engine. 

The aural magic comes from irregular timing: the second T quickly follows the first and there's a gap before it starts over again. That's exactly how Harley twin cylinders fire: unevenly.

The staccato you hear from any motorcycle engine is actually a series of sonic pops that come from puffs of exhaust gas as they get squirted out of the combustion chamber at the end of each cycle. This is the T in the baTaTa. When the pops are evenly spaced, you're listening to a common motorcycle; when they're uneven, you're losing your hearing to a thundering Harley. 

If you have trouble visualizing a piston engine, look no further than down your leg. Imagine riding a bicycle, standing up. Your thigh is the piston and it reciprocates by going up and down. Your knee is the wristpin that turns this into rotary motion and your shank is the connecting rod that delivers this turning motion to the pedal. The pedal spins a crank which drives a chain to rotate the rear wheel. That's exactly how a motorcycle works. 

The difference of course is the power. Since you'd rather slurp dahi batata puri than sip octane, you're condemned to deliver puny human-power, instead of brawny horsepower.

Your legs are also constrained to work so that one thigh goes up when the other goes down, since they are connected to diametrically opposing pedals. A two-cylinder motorcycle engine does not suffer this constraint since each piston is connected separately to the crankshaft that it can independently turn (using its own crankpin). However, they are usually timed to be opposed—when one piston is at the top, the other is at the bottom—to keep forces balanced, vibration minimized, and the rider's gonads intact. 

The pistons in a Harley Davidson V-twin have 45-degrees between them and connect into a single crankpin (imagine a single pedal on your bicycle for both legs), so they are constrained to move together in a manner that one cannot be fully up when the other is fully down. So one cylinder fires shortly after the other and they both wait restively for a while until the next cycle. 

It is this drama that sends baTaTa pops into your ears and rastaman vibrations into your pants. 

That's the Harley way! Just have your children early.

An Observatory Called Lick

This story starts with the improbable James Lick who was born in Pennsylvania in the early 19th century and chased every boy's dream of becoming a piano-maker, in the manner a boy today might want to become a YouTuber: by just doing it. 

Lore has it that he didn't stop there and was tickling something more than mere piano ivories, for he got a mill owner's daughter pregnant and received such a sound thrashing for his impetuosity that it forced him to bail out of the country of his birth and take his skills to the place where his pianos were being bought in large numbers: Buenos Aires. 

Escaping Portuguese imprisonment while returning from a trip to Europe, Lick moved his craft to Chile and then onto Peru to escape political disfavor, before leaving once again to complete an epic arc around the Americas, moving for the last time—along with his piano tools, thirty thousand dollars in gold, and six hundred pounds of Peruvian chocolate—to the little port town of Yerba Buena that would soon change its name: San Francisco. 

Lick was known to be a surly man but his chocolates went over so well with the gold rushers that he decided to open up this opportunity to his buddy back in Lima: Domenico.

That chocolatier Domenico—like his fellow Genoese Christopher Columbus more than three hundred years prior—had similarly set sail across the Atlantic, but with the more prosaic intent of setting up a coffee-and-chocolate business in Uruguay rather than discovering India, before moving that business to Peru and now, responding to Lick's scrupulous market research and audacious proposition, moving it once again along that same epic arc across the Americas that would end up in that town of several hundred by the Golden Gate, where he installed his fledgling chocolate business and bestowed it with his last name: Ghiradelli.

But let's not lose track of the prescient Lick who started buying real estate in that small rechristened town that grew twentyfold in two years when the gold rush really hit, only to double down by entering the hotel business and setting up Lick House on Montgomery Street—the best hotel west of the Mississippi until it would be consumed by the big earthquake of 1906—and then buying even more land far down where his ambitions grew, even as the peninsula ended: San Jose.

Laid down by a stroke and presumably wreaked with introspection, Lick spent his last three years considering how he might spend his considerable fortune, giving up the idea of erecting a pyramid in his own honor in San Francisco that would be larger that the Great Pyramid of Giza and opting instead to fund a mountaintop observatory with the largest telescope ever built by man, that would be installed in his name atop the tallest mountain in the entire bay area: Mount Hamilton.

So what has all this to do—you may rightfully ask—with what you came here to read: Motorcycle monologues?

Well, the Lick Observatory is my destination and I leave early in the morning so I might ride across the entire city of San Jose in minimal traffic before joining up with the serpentine route 130, constructed exactly over the same track laid down almost a century and a half ago to convey building materials, cement, and presumably large refracting telescope parts across twenty miles and three hundred and sixty five curves and switchbacks, but with a slope never exceeding six degrees so it may comfortably be ascended with the best propulsion of the time: Horses.

My ride today is tougher than usual, the challenge having less to do with the terrain and more with the punishment meted out by the rising sun that flashes sharply and unexpectedly between the countless turns and tall trees on the mountain road, taunting my vision and rendering futile my sunglasses and visor, for my ride this morning—unlike recent others—has put me in a new direction: East.

Pointing the motorcycle at the large white dome of James Lick's largesse, I reach the summit a bit before nine, park the bike under the Olde Astronomers Dining Hall and dismount with that urgent singular intent that yearns for privacy, only to spot a lone cyclist rubbing his hands to bring some warmth into the cold morning and gently shifting his feet with that powerful suggestion of identical intent, before he looks at me to allow our eyes to confirm exactly what our bodies seek: a Bathroom.

There are many households at the summit for the astronomers doing duty, with explicit signs reminding visitors to lower their tones but not their zippers, for daytime is when their denizens sleep and the neighborhood is where their children play, when they are not attending that single-roomed institution that shuttered as recently as 2005, after operating for well over a century: The Mount Hamilton School.

The steep driveway to the observatory is blocked off by a locked gate that will only open at noon and just as I accept the utter disappointment of that last-mile denial and prepare to dolefully ride back down the mountain, a staffer appears in a white pickup truck and warmly agrees to open up the gates, allowing the two of us to ride up to use the bathrooms and soak up the spectacular views that—on a clear day like this one—can sweep 270 degrees counterclockwise from due north to due east: Mount Diablo to Yosemite National Park, arcing through the valley of Silicon.

A dozen riders wearing blue Viet Cycling Team jerseys arrive red-faced and panting at the end of the unrelenting six-degree climb to the summit that has taken them almost three hours from the crack of dawn and I chat with a few of them and take some group photos while getting recommendations for restaurants in Vietnam Town in San Jose—the city with more Vietnamese residents than any outside Vietnam—where I plan to stop for my favorite type of sandwich: Banh Mi.

About an hour's ride later, I stare down at a long banh mi that starts with a baguette derived from that country's French colonial past and stuffs it with tofu, mushrooms and avocado instead of Vietnamese pork, as a concession to veg-friendly California, then adds cucumber slices, coriander, pickled radish and carrots in a spicy chili sauce to deliver that perfect amalgam of western bread filled with eastern zing, that I now send down with sips of plain water, for I have declined that thick brew where an ultra-bitter decoction would feud in my palate with super-sweet condensed milk: Vietnamese coffee.

The Fame and Infamy of La Honda

The Younger Gang—outlaws and co-conspirators of the infamous Jesse James—once hid out here, presumably with their stash. Ken Kesey and his Merry Pranksters lived communally in a redwood cabin here where they held their light-and-sound psychedelic LSD-fueled parties, seeking to expand the consciousness of mankind. Tom Wolfe's The Electric Kool-Aid Acid Test—chronicle of the roots of the hippie movement and among the best-cited works of the New Journalism style—got its raw material here. The Grateful Dead played here. Which means the Hell's Angels rode in on their thundering motorcycles. Hunter Thompson and Neil Young lived here too.

I'm in La Honda—a tiny forgotten mountain town with less than a thousand residents—that I reach around nine on a recent morning. The ride, along Alpine Road, winds west for many miles over long stretches of frequent tight turns through nature preserves and creeks, leaving the motorcycle raucous and impatient in second gear. 

At low gear and speed, a motorcycle gets hot very quickly and will dutifully let your legs know. Early motorcycle engines were air-cooled and depended on metal fins around the cylinders to stick out into the airflow to give up their heat. Then liquid cooling came along using water's superior thermal properties over metal to soak up engine heat. But liquid cooling needs a big radiator up front to dissipate heat from the water itself and that mucks with the aesthetics of motorcycle minimalism. It is for this reason that most Harleys are still air-cooled even as their riders atop are willfully slow-cooked, like the frog in the fable. Harleys also persist with V-twin layouts that puts one unlucky cylinder at the rear and in the hot slipstream of its happier twin ahead. 

Bad science! Bitchin' sound!

I stop at the La Honda Market—the town's only store—with supplies, beverages, and a sandwich counter that looks barren. A man in a blue plaid shirt takes my money and points to the large coffee carafe. 

Tiny 50 oz. bottles of Jack Daniels and Smirnoff stand tidily against each other like soldiers in a parade, ready to move for $2.99 each. A framed old poster on the wall offers a $500 award: 

Wanted Notorious Outlaw—Belle Starr. 

Belle Starr was a rare woman outlaw from the post Civil War period and an associate of many of the notorious Missouri-born criminals, including the Younger Brothers who had moved to La Honda. But she must have lacked their keen bloodlust, for the poster warns us thus: 

"Though not a killer she is known to carry two Pistols and has a reputation for being a Crack Shot!"  

Shot to death at the age of forty-one, Belle Starr lives on in many movies, books, and songs from musicians like Woody Guthrie and Mark Knopfler.

I take my coffee to the small porch outside and settle down on one of the tables overlooking the road. The coffee lid frustratingly lacks an air vent and the enjoyment from the beverage is rudely annulled by my constant anxiety from trying to get at the coffee while fighting a possible spill at every sip. Tired of fighting nature's abhorrence of a damn vacuum, I finally remove the lid and throw it away.

A cyclist pulls up, leans his bike against the rail, and goes in. Two large water bottles sit on the triangular bike frame, like V-twins on a Harley. He comes out with a sandwich and I find a way to start up a conversation. Turns out that he's on an 85-mile bike ride today that will take him across the mountains, to the beach and then back again—which I believe might partially explain why he didn't come out brandishing one or more of them 50 oz. bottles for two-ninetynine apiece. But he makes me curious about the fuel requirements for his arduous trip and so I ask him what he's eating. 

"Ham and cheese is what I usually get, but they are out of it today. Don't know what this one is," he says as he peels back the wrap and digs in. Small semicircular cutouts appear rapidly on the round fat bun that soon disappears. 

We leave together and I'm happy to be the one on the motored bike. He slips his feet into clipless pedals to become one with his bicycle, waves and rides away with striking ease.

I cross the street and walk over to the rustic shack diagonally across. This is Apple Jack's—a roadhouse and watering hole—that has quenched bandits, horsemen, stagecoach travelers, beatniks, bikers, hikers and techies, over 142 years. The facade wears an exhausted droop and the tall redwoods that surround and dwarf it appear to have taken over the responsibility to prop the place up and keep it standing. The saloon still comes alive every weekend with live blues, rock, and country music that floats around, adding bounce to the dusty feet dancing away on the creaky floorboards, before wafting down the mountains and dissipating into the valleys.

I get back on the bike and ride down a narrow side road looking for Ken Kesey's restored cabin, but can't find it. Kesey was supposed to have written parts of One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, his first novel, on the bathroom walls and I wonder if they might have been preserved. The road ends at a trailhead leading to the newly created La Honda Creek Preserve and I disappointedly turn the motorcycle around and ride back out. 

I head out north for a few miles on highway 84 to get to the junction with highway 35, marked by the iconic Alice's Restaurant—a building from the early 1900s that was turned into a restaurant in the 50s and proclaims to be "little slice of bliss among the redwoods". Motorcycles and low-slung sports cars fill the irregular lot in the middle of the four-way junction that it occupies. A single retro gas pump with an analog readout gurgles away, in stark contrast with a biker in a mod red-and-white leather suit fueling his fiery red Ducati. 

I turn south onto Skyline Drive and follow the road over the ridge of the mountains for about fifteen miles, before descending down in a flurry of bends.